Creating Peak Experinces

Just recently, on a camp I was running with kids, we were teaching about how Jesus is our shepherd and that He knows us by name. John 10 speaks about how the sheep know the shepherd’s voice and follow Him.  Well, I thought what better way to teach them this than with real sheep. Little did I know how powerful this experience was going to be for so many. How unprepared was I for what God was going to teach us all about His love and protection just through 4 little sheep. So, we made a pen, got some sheep for the week and began to dream about how we could bring this teaching alive for the children throughout the week.

The passage speaks about the Shepherd caring for the sheep, knowing their names, protecting them when trouble hits and the difference between the hired hand and the real shepherd. We unpacked this each day at camp by setting up situations and challenges for each of these aspects of the teaching.  

To begin with, the kids were very excited when they got there to see the sheep and we began by setting up a competition to name the sheep. The top 4 names would win and this began our growing affection for the sheep.  The kids were able to feed the sheep from the outside to begin with, which was difficult at first, because when they came to us, the sheep didn't trust us and they were very scared in their new surroundings. There was certainly no trust at this time and no one could get close to them.

We talked of watching over the sheep and protecting them from those who wanted to steal or hurt them. Being surrounded by nature and bush, we knew that there were foxes around our area, and so we talked of needing to have “shepherds of the night” so the sheep were being watched all the time and therefore would be kept safe.  This meant that cabins of kids could apply to be the “shepherds of the night”, which entailed camping out in tents, keeping the fire going (stocked with marshmallows of course for cooking over the fire)  and keeping watch over the sheep throughout the night.  I was surprised how many cabins wanted to do this, more than the nights we had at camp, so it became quite a special experience if your cabin was nominated.  They had to get the campfire started, then got to sit around and sing, tell stories, bond, eat roasted marshmallows and occasionally check the sheep.  They took shifts throughout the night and when I came out each morning about 6.00am to see them there was always someone sitting out near the stoked fire, enjoying the heat and keeping watch. The stories, the bonding, the chance to talk about the commitment of the Shepherd to watch over the sheep, the sacrifice, the loss of creature comforts of a warm comfortable bed, as many nights at this camp were cold and raining, were all great things that they ACTUALLY experienced. 

There were times when the kids wanted to go back to their cabins. They had had their marshmallows, a bit of fun, and it was time to go back. The fun had worn off…but no…they learned the hard way, that it was not just all fun and games. There were mornings where they crawled out of dripping tents with wet mattresses ... all great opportunities for great experiential learning.  All said they were glad they did it, but were not keen to do again. This showed the love of the shepherd, to do whatever it takes to know his sheep were safe, not just one night but all the time.  For some of these kids it was the first time ever to camp out, make a fire, stay up late and sing around the camp fire.  For most it was the highlight of camp. 

In the middle of camp, while the kids were at an activity, the sheep were stolen (all set up of course). The kids came back to find their leaders in the pen with a ransom note saying “Unless you do exactly what we say, you will never see your sheep again”. The kids’ reactions were priceless. They were straight into action, freeing their leaders and then setting off through a series of challenges to finally find the rustlers with the sheep on the other side of the campsite.  When they found them, the rustlers begged for forgiveness, realising they had done the wrong thing and the kids (with encouragement) invited them back to our campfire dinner that night to celebrate that our lost sheep were found. Again, the stories around the campfire that night were priceless. We got the kids to share what happened, and the some leaders shared around picnic rugs with a small group of children, what it meant for them to be lost and found by Jesus in their life. Needless to say those on “shepherd of the night” duty that night were particularly determined to make sure the sheep were safe. 

Throughout the week as I was unpacking the biblical story, I used pictures of the kids I was taking to tell the story, so they were in it, a part of it, experiencing it and for all of us this story came to life in a very new way.  

Each day the kids who were “Shepherds of the night,” got to go into the pen, corral the sheep into a corner and handle them and pat them. Each day this got easier and easier. I got to experience this more than any of them as the group was different each day. The kids on the last day didn't even need to get in the pen. We rustled the bag, called them and they came to us and fed from our hands. This was very different from the beginning of the week, where the sheep were unsure and scared of us and didn't trust us at all.  What a transformation, which we talked about on the last day of camp.  How much more does our Shepherd know us and love us.  We like sheep, still weave and duck and run away. We are helpless and can get easily lost, but our shepherd will always come looking for us, will always care for us and knows each of us by name.

I believe this is an experience that many of our kids and team (and me) will never forget. I will never read that story the same way again. Like many camping experiences, it will go down as a PEAK EXPERIENCE for me and for many of the children at camp, one where they gained a DEEPER understanding of God’s love, grace, patience, and sacrifice. What types of PEAK EXPERIENCES are you creating for you and your kids, young people, your families, that can become anchor points which God can use to secure HIS TRUTH into us all, that we then take with us for the rest of our lives?

Never too late, Never rejected

I was staying at Coffs Harbour in a caravan park near the beach, so I set my alarm to see the sunrise one morning.   But before the alarm went off I woke to light streaking through the curtain in my room.  “Darn it,” I thought. I missed it. 

But I decided to still throw my clothes on, grab my camera bag and start running towards the beach to see what I could see. Having arrived late the previous night, I didn’t know where I was going, but I knew I was running toward the sound of the sea, down a marked track. It was the longest track ever to get to beach.  On my way, I realised I had forgotten my glasses, my socks were slipping down to my toes in my shoes which made it all more uncomfortable and challenging, I was now wet from all the thick grass I was wading through, and to think only 10 minutes ago I was warm, dry and cosy in my bed.

I was sure I had missed the sunrise.  I could hear the waves. They were on my right hand side. The track seemed to lead everywhere but to them. As I continued to run through the thick scrub, waiting for the track to veer towards the sound of the waves, I was thinking, “What am I doing? I’ve missed it and I don’t even know if I am running in the right direction”.  Cleary I was not very well prepared. The kangaroo further down the path looked at me as if to say, “a little late mate”. I barrelled onward as he jumped into the bush to get out of my way.

Part of me felt like giving up, but what the heck, I had come this far, so might as well finish this adventure. Finally I came to the clearing, wet, puffing and hoping I had everything in my camera to even take a photo. At this stage it wouldn't have surprised me what else I had forgotten. The sun had been up for a while but it was behind a thin, but large set of clouds as if to say, “I have started, Tammy, but come on in and watch the tail end. It will be worth it. I am glad you made it. I saved the best till last.” 

Then, there it was. His beauty, His cleverness, His light calling me to look, to gaze. It drew all of my attention. I could not look away. I am glad I made it, even if it was late.

Sometimes we might feel we are a little too late, unprepared, hurried, lost, confused, not know where we are going or even uncomfortable. I know in those 20 minutes I certainly felt all those things.  But He still says come, enjoy, you’re  always welcome. 

On my long walk home I discovered I went the long way right around the beach into that next cove. I clearly missed the sign that said “2 mins to the beach”, but it turned out to be the much better view, a much better vantage point to view the sunrise, a much prettier cove to land in. I am glad I did not give up. I am glad that even though I was late, unprepared and a little lost…He still met me. His love still shone on me and said, “Good morning.” His beauty still amazed me and He did not disappoint.

Come to think about it, I feel like this in many aspects of ministry and life. There are not many times when I am about to speak or lead or sing or run something, when I don’t think, “What am I doing here? I feel unprepared (which for me usually means not good enough), confused, uncomfortable.”  I just want to turn and go back to my safe, warm alone space.  At some point of each day as a mum, parent and friend I can feel hurried, lost, not good enough, wanting to give up and hide.  But His love pulls me forward, challenges me to keep on going, to keep turning up, keep bringing whatever I have to offer, as confused and messy and unprepared as it sometimes feels.  His welcoming beauty always accepts my offering and is really happy that I show up, even if it is a little late, wet and puffed. He draws my attention.  I cannot look away, I cannot quit, I will never leave, because His constant truth and love spur me on. He accepts and loves me just as I am. Thank you for this constant reminder.

What did I hear from you today? - Communication within marriage is not always easy

Communication is a tough challenge at the best of times but it is especially so when emotions are involved. David and I have been married 27 years and been together 32 years, you would think that after all these years we would have mastered it by now.

We know enough to know that we have two different responses to misunderstanding. One of us retreats and one of us attacks, it doesn’t really matter who does what, what matters is being aware of it and working through it. We know enough about our temperaments to know that one likes to fix and one just wants the other to listen. When it comes to a place where we just don’t see eye to eye, it can be a very hard and confusing place to be.

One way that we have found a way through is to give each other space to ask the question “What did I hear from you today?”. They say “time out” is great for kids, well I think it is mandatory for good communication. 

Not so long ago our day began with a misunderstanding, it was clear that we just weren’t able to hear each other, it was not a nice start to the day.  In this instance, the key is to know when to call a “time out”. It is never nice to leave things unresolved, but this particular day we were not getting anywhere and I am not sure who called the “time out” first but we were both relieved when it happened. He left the house and drove to work, I sat in a slump and did what most women do, just cried. 

I am a writer, so it helps me to process things by writing. I love how God meets me there often and “Time out” with Him is always Healing and comforting. After a while I decided to send Dave an email answering the question “What did I hear from you today?”.... the ”Ï” statements are important, even if you don’t start there, make sure that’s where you land before you press send. Even if this is not what the other person actually said, it is important to try to hear what each other are hearing. 

I have been in conversations with people who are hurting or frustrated and trying to work things out with their partners and you know it just can’t go anywhere if they are speaking with statements “he just won’t listen, she is the problem, they will just not see my point of view, he is wrong, she is hurting me.” 

I finished the email by saying....

Please pray for me, I am broken and I am scared. Please pray that God speaks to you with clarity, so we can be on this journey together as I don’t want to do this alone.

Dave responded very quickly with a phone call to say that the email really helped him understand what I was hearing and that we would talk again tonight and try to clarify the misunderstandings.

So quickly the “I” and the “me” quickly became “we” again as we work hard to keep our communication open, because we are willing to ask the question “what did I hear from you today?” and that day we were willing to really listen to each other.